Friday, February 27, 2009

I need to know:

Alright, I know no one is reading this blog, or could care less about it, however, in the off chance that you have stumbled across this and would like to answer, I would like to hear it.

I have a question to all of you writers out there and I mean writers who do it for a living, or are trying to do it for a living. The question is:
Do you hate your own work as much as I hate my own? I know, like most art, most artist hate their own work, even after it is finished, but I never knew I would feel sick looking at my own writing. But I do, and that is the problem.
Do I feel sick because I know it is terrible? Is it because it drains so much of my mental energy that I just can't look at it? I don't know, but all I do know is every time I go to write, I want to cut myself, or throw my self into traffic, and I mean the High School traffic, you know? The good stuff.
It drives me nuts, though, knowing that the only thing I can do in this world, that makes me money (aside from something illegal) I hate doing, and the one thing I swore to myself when I was young, I would not do anything that made me feel like crap, for a living. But I have this strange relationship with writing.
When I do write and it comes out good, or well, or even just "okay" I totally feel a high, akin to sex, or the feeling I used to get on Xmas Eve. The problem is, getting to that point.

Anyway, if anyone ever reads this and feels like elaborating on your own writing style, please, feel free to share here! I just want to know its not just me.

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